slump week.

i don't have any photos today myself.  i took a limited amount at the party Saturday, but was too busy playing host, as it should be.  some weeks i pick up the camera and take lots of photos around the house but this week i've just not felt like it.  i'm in this weird sort of slump.  no energy, no enthusiasm, general lack of caring really about doing anything around here.

i can't pinpoint it.  partly recovery after the busy weekend with the party. partly because i've not been sleeping well. partly because i'm pre-menstrual.  partly, because i'm still trying to process the end of this relationship that has had no closure, partly because he cut off contact with me and now I with him. partly because i'm thinking of taking on writing this novel that both thrills and scares the hell out of me, fear of failure, yes.

it's in these times that i, like you, think about de-cluttering, making simple.  but the thought of that is always easier than the actual action, which can seem overwhelming.  if you are anything like me the actual weight of too many things on my mind, can feel more burdensome than any physical strain.  unfortunately, i know my friend you sometimes have the burden of both.

in truth, i've been neglecting the very things that would make me more whole.  i've not been on the yoga mat the past week which has left me with this nervous energy at night, my eating has fallen by the wayside into comfort food overload which leaves me sluggish, and when i should be embracing the wisdom i usually find in Buddhist truths on change and fear, this morning was the first morning i dared sit with a loving kindness meditation and that was driving down the road to work.

it's one of those, oh no, things are a bit burdensome right now kind of weeks.  i'm hoping a quiet weekend and returning to the yoga mat will help.  i may have to pick up the book of my old friend when i'm down, pema chodron.

hope you are feeling better.  cheers to a finer week next week.